scripted

i need to work on my script. but i don't know how. i just wish it would magically come together, type itself out, mail itself to whoever gets these things and then either be rejected or picked up.

i hand wrote the entire thing. i did little character biographies on each of the main characters. i actually like it and would want to see a film like this.

originally, i had wanted it to be for vincent gallo - to star and direct. but i think i've changed my mind, or at least softened on that point. i just loved "buffalo '66" so much, and it really inspired me to dig this out of myself. he and i emailed each other once, and i lost the nerve to tell him i'd written something for him (i mean, what would he have said? "get away from me with that crap, i'm not reading your drivel" or "sure, let me read it" - um, okay. it's handwritten vincent, okay?)
and then i saw the brown bunny, and i thought maybe it's not for him exclusively afterall. who knows.

sometimes i feel like just starting a totally new one. but i feel like i'm cheating on the other one. its insane.

it's 3:02 PM. i have another 3 and a half hours to be here. then i have to rush to the train, cram on it, hoping to get a seat, and ride home. i swear, i'm running out of energy. i can't wake up anymore. i don't know if it's depression or pregnancy or both. i have no trouble sleeping at night though. very lucky. oh how i want to listen to sad 80s music. some seriously great pity party music was written in the 80s.

i still have so much work to do on the baby's room. it's scary. we have to rip up the carpet, put down new flooring, fix and paint the walls, buy a crib and dresser/changer. then there are a billion other things. of course it's tiny. and she won't be sleeping in there for at least 3 months. i still can't believe i'm having a baby. freaking me out. the ramones were on before and she went nuts. can't believe that either. i actually have a mini punker inside me, and she's a fan of one of the bands i never liked!

okay it's time to shut up now. nothing positive to say. maybe i'll post tonight if i'm feeling a little better. ciao!